Purpose of mentoring
- What ever the mentee’s needs are
- Career progression
- Cross road / decision
- General personal improvement
- Provide a safe environment for learning and growth
- Learn from mentor’s experiences
- Help mentee learn to think
- Enrich professional relationship
- Help make connections
What to expect
- Time commitment
- Work towards mentee’s goals
- Expect the mentee to work
- Share “how I did it” moments
- Prepare before meeting
- Improved people skills
- Greater perspective
Four stages of mentoring
1- Preparing
- Set assumptions and limitation
- Set expectation and goals
- Define deliverables
2. Negotiating
- Establish ground rules with structure and flexibility
- Confidentiality
- How problems will be resolved
- establish the needs of the mentee
3. Enabling
- At the first meeting set the tone for the rest and place expectations
- How you dress and show up sets the tones
- Outline an action plan based on mentee’s obstacles and fears
- In your own word what do you want to achieve
- Set homework for the next meeting if need be
- Confirmation of the next meeting
4. Closing
- Provides closure for each of you
- Debrief and celebrate
Subsequent meetings
- Agenda prepared by mentee
- Balance small talks vs objectives
- Follow-up and accountability
- Ask questions to guide thinking
- Give feedback and advice
- Use role play and simulation on a challenging or scary scenario
- Open up and share experience
- Challenge leading to growth
- Pre-teach: ” I am going t tell you something that will help you“
- Use positive feedback to highlight the right things people are doing
Accountability
- “Did you do what you said you would do ?“
- Focus on specifics
- Knowing that this question is coming is motivating
- Focus on the right things
- If they didn’t do it, do it know ?
- “Why or why not? Tell me about it.”
Giving feedback and advice tactfully
- What is the purpose of the advice ?
- Focus on the behaviour not the person
- Make your message clear, do not use joke or sarcasm
- Practice before giving
- Mentee might argue, rationalise.
- Is this the right time to give the feedback?
- Beware of emotions
The mentee journal
- Might be a good idea for the mentee to have a journal
- Not a private journal, should be ok to browse through with mentee’s permission
- Includes session’s notes
- Might include thought and feelings
- Debrief after a meeting with introspection
- Source of inspiration (can be used afterwards)
Wrapping up the mentoring relationship
- Review the mentee’s progress
- Ask them what they have learned
- Ask them where they have grown
- What their future goals and what is needed too achieve them
- Do they feel prepared to move forward
- Discuss what the future of the relationship will be
- Celebrate the ending (success = celebration)
- Celebrate accomplishments
- Express gratitude
- Reach out to mentee for time to time for updates
- Through touch points stay on their radar
- The critical thank you email
- Summary of last meeting points
- Offer help moving forward
- Ideas and suggestions for mentee
- Express gratitude
- Recognise your own growth
- Are you a better listener?
- Do you give feedback differently?
- Are you better are resolving conflict?
- Did you realise the power of you experiences?
- How will this help you move forward?
- What goals would set for yourself?
- What advice would you give to yourself?
What if you end on a bad note?
- Do not criticise mentee unless invited to do so
- Use tact in your communication
- Hurt feelings are natural
- What fault do you have
- Keep relationship opportunity opened
- Never, ever, ever tell bad things about mentee (looks bad on you too). Violates trusts and confidentiality